Japan must be way ahead of us in training their Racoon Dogs. I can’t get mine to sit, let alone take my shoes off. And they can read too.

*EDIT* This is in fact from a video game peripheral. An off-brand Dance Dance Revolution dance pad, to be precise. Nice job to all the sleuths and problem-solvers out there!

Submitted by:

eestreit

Edit 7/28: Congraturation! Engrish Fliend Anders has not only correctly identified this as a helmet instruction manual, but even found a PDF of the file. Very resourceful!

–When the gun tube stem, use the plastics stick stop the thing pure drop,
–When Switch for “off”, trigger be locking.
When switch for “on”, trigger opening
–Firing(confirm safety sufficiently before veginning firing)

Submitted by:

leonmcg

Submitted by: jeeva2 via Engrish Funny Submissions

This was on the “clothesline” in the bathroom of our Japanese hotel room.

Submitted by: Zestawoman via Engrish Funny Submissions

Submitted by: dunno source via Engrish Funny Submissions

Submitted by: dunno source via Engrish Funny Submissions

Submitted by: dunno source via Engrish Funny Submissions

Trouble & Dealing with
Promble
No operation
of propellers
Cause
1. Switch of Power “OFF”
2. No power of helo
3. Switch of Contriller “OFF”
1. Interfered by other infrared

I feel confused

Submitted by: Tom via Engrish Funny Submissions

In the instruction manual for some toy helicopters.

“PEARL IN THE PALM
Say good if use it!”

“Super Value Coloured Pattern”

“Make you walk easily on the forest end of era in fashion”

OPERATING INSTRUCTIONS

1. Paub on a layer of botterm oil on the nail there is a obvious distinction between the colour of botterm oil and nail polish’ s
2. Use nail-washing water to clean the protective polish on the head tear off the protective film on the design board.
3. put the design board into the design board localizer daub your favorite nail polish on the fixed design
4. use scraping knife to scrape surplus polish press the print head and get the pattern and print the design on the nail toe-nail.phone
5. Decorations can be added on the printed pattern, coat bright oil on it bright oil should be touched upon lightly don’ t paint over and over again, or the pattern will be destroyed.
6. It knife can’t clean surplus polish use spare nail file to file a way rough edges.

I’d rather head to the salon

Submitted by: Bruno via Engrish Funny Submissions

IMPORTANT!
1. Atways cansult a physiclun befare embarking on any exercise plan.
2. Wear lonse fiuing clothes and dress in severul layers to keep warm. If you are too hor you always remave a top.
3. Always warm up before exercising. Allow at least 5 minutes and remember to inelude a stretching routinc.
4. Make sure your equipment is in good shape Before using it to work out. Ensure all bauds. Cables. Clips and screws are wel secured.
5. Drink plenty of ftuids afies exercising Carbohydrate drinks or water.

Why not just use an illustration?

Submitted by: dunno source via Engrish Funny Submissions

1. when the lamp shade was move, do not let the lamp bright
2. do not put the lamp to that fall down easy
3. when do not use the lamp please pull out the mains
4. do not near to window curtain

I’ve always loved your work.

Submitted by: StressedYeti via Engrish Funny Submissions

Multi-Chopper
Mode of Job for Multi-Chopper
In order that the article has minced could be perfectly cut, Knocked Vigorously on the bud Superior hand Opened. The most of less great number of knocks determines the fineness of cup. The rotation of knives is made automatically and regularly. For the cleaning, to pull the inferior bell and to release the recipient Superior. Well to rinse the machine, if possible to the running water. Re-assembly in Senses inverts. All parts metallic are executed in a materials has the test of the rust.
For Herbs and Vegetables
Simples Cleaning
Effective and quickly
Cutting well View Control
Made in China

Submitted by: Ted B via Engrish Funny Submissions

Hook(Fitting:Adhesivetape)
Attention
Unable to stick when the surface is wet, oil, dirty or waxen
Clean it with organic impregnant when the surface is wet, oil, dirty or waxen
don’t hang clock, camera, mirror and so on.
Don’t hang it near gas-overn and high tem. Place
Don’t stick it on unsmooth surface
Don’t overload
Don’t hang things in declining way
To be safety you can’t stick it on vitreous desk and stove, mustn’t roast things on stove
In winter, you’d better warm the interface appreciably with heating machine
Unable setting place
(unsmooth, roughness, flakily plane)
Earthy wall, plaster wall, wallpaper, wall fabric leatheroid and wet painty surface
Balneary, watery and the place that water easily

Submitted by: skeletorthemagnificent via Engrish Funny Submissions

III, How to use
1, Please tune up power volume to aproposity, before put it into jeck
2, Take for you clothing the plastic
3, Wear properly:L is left, R is right
IV, Attention:
1, Take care to avoid disturbing others.
2, Don’t dranght in the jeck
V, Caution:
If our products have quality problem indeed, protection time for 6 months

Submitted by: Star via Engrish Funny Submissions

pat pat stick operating
pat pat stick only need mouth gassing
when filling with gas the inpouring mouth sealed automation
uses:cheering-section of ball match and other matches, starting business propaganda, enterprise adver,birthday, new year, christmas gifts etc, this product can be used for several times

Submitted by: kaydenc-jy via Engrish Funny Submissions

Step 1
Gather hair into a right ponytail at nope of nedk
Step 2
Firmly twist ponytail to the right while pulling up toward the ceiling
Step 3
Hold end of ponytail with right hand. Cun rwist with left hand-keeping fngers f*cked inside

via Engrish Funny Submissions. Submitted by: Sara L

Please do not see it while drinking drink. The PET bottle caps it and put it in a bag, and please carry it. Please see the thing which the chief does not have after finishing drinking.

Engrish photo by Melanie H