WALOOOHHH TANPULUTZZZ
tofuHHH sauzzzyyy
calamarezz witHHH tatziki sauz
cheezz stickHH
crispy pataaahhh
chixen bollzz
squid bollzz
frencHHH friezzz
garlic button musHHHrooom
garlic cHHHixen
hotdog hoootyy
onion ringHHH wid sour cream
siomaiHHHH lala
popcorn popoop
roasted peaHHHunut
buffaloooHHH wingzzz
spizy squidHHH
tokwa’t baboy ramabatHHHan
lecHHHon kawali
Submitted by: miGsKills via Engrish Funny Submissions
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Copy & paste this:
Yes, I’ll have the “Hotdog Hoootyy ” and a small “Popcorn popoop” extra “Popoop” please. Kthxbi.
Sorry, all the popoop got used to make the butt cake.
they’re real @nal about sticking to the recipee
Oh, come on! What’s a Hotdog Hoootyy without Blowfish?
Damn every time I eat that I go blind…
It’s an appetizer
‘Recipee’? Is that even a word?!?!?
Crispy pataaahhh. The latest thing in Klingon cuisine.
Not cooked crispy. They leave the shells on.
Crispy is a code word for FrieDDD.
I don’t want to eat at the International House of Phlegm…
SNAP INTO CHEEZ STICKHHH WHOOOOOOO YEAAHHHHHHHHH
I am proud to say this came from Philippines. Some Folkz here imitate gangstah speak. Like this one
At least there isn’t a string of zzeros on the prices.
word
*clonk*
Word, you say? Here’s one: loquacious
I’d likke the chixen suxzz wid potato wedgezzz pleaaase
Chixen cant suxxx… aint got no lipzzz.
I sure don’t recall eating here, but I’m positive I’ve had the musHHHrooomzz bbbbeeeeeFFFoooooooorrreeee…
blek. Your breath smellssssss. uuusee some mouth washhhh
I… I… can’t! It keeps… changing colorrrrzzzzz…
Ok squid bollzz? That’s a lot to charge for so little
Don’t be so sure. Those squid have been known to play a lot of AC/DC covers…
In my opinion, I don’t like their taste.
In whose opinion DO you like their taste?
And is the taste you don’t like that of squid, AC/DC, or bolzz?
In my opinion, you like their taste just fine. You liked them last week.
–Mom
beHHHzt failllll eWWWah!
I would like the garlic cHHHixen…oh darned hiccups, again.
WWE fAAAn fooorrr surree!
Lol! This is filipino cuisine. Means its food you pair with beer or anything alcoholic. Crispy pata is fried pork leg w/c is yummy BTW. And Im betting the maker of this lulzy menu is a Manny Pacquiao (boxer) fan. like how the ring announcer says is you know… MAAAAANNNNYYYY PuhpuhpppppAAAAAACCCCQQQQUAIOOOOOOOO
Cool explanation!
So if you don’t drink, you can’t eat in this place?
I doubt they’d mind if you’re feeling peckish and just order the dishes without any liquor. And yes, this probably came from the Philippines: ‘tan-puluts’ is sort of slang for the actual Filipino word ‘pulutan’ (you can see what we did there) which refers to food paired with alcohol, as explained earlier by waxxo. Incidentally, if you pair them with some cups of rice instead, you’d have a fine dinner.
It would be AFTER the drinking that I would start feeling peckish.
Is this supposed to be good English? You’ve got every aspect of this language wrong: grammar, spelling, puncuation… When you were in school, you must have been one of those super-stupid kids who got a D- in every subject and spelt ‘cat’ as ‘kat’. Learn to write properly, and come back here when you have done so.
That one you can’t see is chixen stixzz wid potato wedgezzz
I would insist that they at least separate the chicken from the potato wedges. I don’t like foods stuck together.
SoHH is tHHHee trickH about addingHH capital H’sHHH toH practiclyHH evHHery wHord?H
The HHHHHH is the sound of the cheering crowd
or somebody who’s really cold
I thought a hissing lolcat interrupted the menu with all the Hs.
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
It looks like some kind of restaurant theme – though why you’d want the sounds of screams, groans, gasps and buzzing chainsaws as your restaurant theme, I’m not sure.
I told you–it’s the new Manson Family Restaurant! Where they always give you the sharp knives…
John B makes a good point
Dr. handle to comment #75447 please. We have another Dreadful pun-er on our hands..
I’m on it. Tom, you naughty boy… *clonk*
Of course, I told you that about another restaurant entirely, where the menu appeared to be crudely scrawled in blood, but if you take enough acid, you’ll never know the difference.
Please john, lets not go back to the avid again..
I never left. I’m still avid after all these years.
This is the best Engrish I have ever seen.
Why did I read all of these out in a funny voice?
Also, I’m disappointed that “roasted peaHHHunut” is singular.
Just one?!
Well how else can they keep their price at 45?
There’s only one, but it’s HUGE! They pumped it full of air.
Well, if it’s a 45, it’s got that big hole in the middle, anyway.
There’s still enough to go around, then?
There’s so much it might break the record.
As long as it doesn’t break the record player, we should be fine.
It’s simple. This is exactly the way that my cats type. I’m betting that the busy restaurant owner got her kitteh to write up the menu.
As long as they don’t serve up what cats usually catch.
Now that would be a great restaurant!
I can imagine the menu:
Dead mouse with dried-up blood
Slimy hairball
Used menstrual pad
Dead rat with his guts coming out
Half-eaten goldfish
I told you this would make a great restaurant!
Is this a list of wresters’ names then? Or possibly the field in a horse race? Nah, I got it, it’s the list that “celebrities” use to choose names for their unsuspecting offspring.
HHH is A Pro-wrestler Name thats Why!!!
You’re right! This IS the list that celebs use to choose names for their kids. So many stars have turned to this list for inspiration: Tom Cruise, Gwyneth Paltrow, Nicole Richie, Courtney Love… not to mention the parents of Audio Science and Pilot Inspektor!
I so want to eat there and order my food by yelling at the waiter across the room!
-”Got thHHhose chixen bollzz yetTT?!!?!”
They really like the WWE Tag Team champion, HHH.
Oh, wow, fail on my part for not reading the title. I am shamed and dishonored.
Awww…it’s ok. *Gives ‘Moods’ a happy* You did your best!
It would be sad if his best included not being able to read the title first. Moodz is either pathetic, or didn’t try his best. Choose!
*either way, he is “shamed and dishonored.”*
Don’t be so harsh on him.
Was I nice enough?
Yes, but now you gave him your happy that we worked so hard to get for you.
I gave him half. See? ./
So that means that you are not completely happy.
Oh… what do you expect from someone who watches pro wrestling? *snaps into a slim jim*
(I’m a SHE, by the way)
All the itens have a HHH, from the Wallooohhh name.
Saporra, you’re fading.
Where can get me some ‘o dat popcorn popoop
I love ghost restraunts…
You guys..its filipino humor. They like to overplay stuff a little bit too much.
But srsly, its like Tapas for the Spanish. And they are all very good btw. pity the menu didnt include “kwek kwek” w/c is deep fried quail eggs covered in some special batter and special sauce. yummy.
Even a little bit too much would be putting it nicely here. Really? If this is/was a joke, it belongs on failblog.
I just can’t decide between the hotdog hoootyy and the popcorn popoop!
My question is: Why can’t I order these dishes any place local?? Why should I have to go who know’s where to get them?
I want to see them on the dollar menu at Burger King ASAP!! Or at least Dairy Queen.
actually this is from my dear old country, the philippines.
ah,i love it.
This reminds me of the time I spilled some sugary soft drink on a keyboard. It gave a whole new meaning to ‘Sticky Keys’.
I hate Sticky Keys. Especially Windows XP’s implementation, where it automatically activates whenever your finger loiters on the shift key (for example) for more than eight seconds. Pure suckage, and remembering how to turn the damn Sticky Keys back off is a royal PITA.
Yeah, I can never remember whether to hit “OK” or “Cancel” when that happens, either. These darn complex programs…
Found this on “Worst 100 ways to deliever bad news.” It was titled “Reprogramme windows”
You have to click my name there.
Aw, do I really have to?
There’s nobody in the store now so a dude was just bellowing this menu out loud and everyone was loling. Priceless.
“tokwa’t baboy ramabatHHHan”
I wonder if they have “Cthulhu R’lyeh fhtagn”
it would have been even better if they held down the keyboard on the prices.
That’s the last time I ask Gollum to transcribe the menu.
*imagines gollum saying onion ringHHH wid sour cream*
*lulz*
Dude,
They might have CthHHHHulHHHHu R’lyeHHHHH F’HHHHtagHHHn….
More likely, thHHHHeey lefttttt thHHHHhe ecHHHHhhho On
My oldskool brain initially interpreted it as backspace being echoed as ^H, and whoever typed this up being a rather poor typist.
Don’t you just HATE it when you get a key stuck on your keyboard?
Looks to me like it was done with a malfunctioning electric typewriter. On a computer the writer would have been able to delete the typos rather easily.
Narcoleptic…I’mmmm sureeeeee offfffff ittttttttt.
Haha.
I once awoke from a brief nap at the keyboard with 42 pages of lower-case Ls.
And also, the frencHHH friezzz looks yummy!
“HHH” equals to 3 with five point stars in some some font [zapf dingbats or windings or some other]
if it is font fail why the many stars?
HHH is A Pro-wrestler Name thats Why!!! WWe Pro Wrestler to Be Exact
LOL this was done on purpouse. It’s a gimmick to make ordering more entertaing. Sorry poster but you fail
i dare someone to read this aloud
|the kid|
Lol this is from the Philippines
I wouldhhh liek teh popcorn popoop wid sum spizy squidHHH, pleezzzHHHH.
This menu’s got game.
hmmm
maybe it’d make sense when you’re drunk y’know.
it’s hard to type up a menu when using a Toyota keyboardddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd
my boyfriend read this to me over skype and sounded out every letter. i was laughing so hard i was in tears.