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That’s illegal in some states
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Cheezburger Company Blog
If I say they look like a monkey? would they berserk and kill me?
Yes, if he’s an orangutan.*
*Discworld ref.
and a Librarian.
Unless you happen to have a whole lot of bananas… That might calm him down… But probably wont.
If you use the m-word in front of the Librarian, it’s going to take a lot more than some bananas to prevent him from attempting to unscrew your head from your body. Ook!
Beer and peanuts maybe?
*musical notes* Yes! We have no bananas. We have no bananas today. *how *old* am I, anyway?*
Hmm, i Love them!
Cooked with Mushrooms and vegetables =)
sure thing, i like em medium pls ^^
That’s good. I expect there’s a law against eating rare animals.
I dont think so Oo…
Ever heard of “Tartare”?
Ever heard of any other meaning for the word “rare”? It’s a Play-on-words, Jake.
It’s a joke, Joyce.
Mmmmm, venison with juniper and sage… kangaroo with mustard and red wine sauce… crocodile with a little bit of lemon and dill… yep, I definitely love those wild animals. No interest in teasing them at all.
You’re making me hungry!
Let’s not eat critters like koalas and woylies, though.
Woylies? Is that a type of bird? After all, I’ve always heard that the woylie boyd gets the woym.
The woylie is one of our many marsupials. I think it’s on the “Endangered” list. We could have a lot of fun with some of the strange marsupial names if they were more widely known. You can bettong it.
The reason the woylie came to mind was that there was a funny story in the news recently. To make a long story short:
Scientists are tracking woylies that have been fitted with small transmitters. They notice that one transmitter hasn’t moved for a while, so they figure that animal is dead and set off to retrieve the transmitter.
When the scientists get to it, they find the woylie has been swallowed by a python, so they take the python back to the lab to wait for nature to take its course.
During the night, thieves break into the lab and steal the python.
Eventually, using the tracking device, the scientists led police to the thieves, who were arrested. Born losers?
The python was retrieved unharmed.
What I find amazing is the rare coincidence of functioning technology overlapping with human cupidity.
I guess that’s why it made the news.
I’m not in favour of eating endangered animals, because 1) they’re endangered, and 2) they tend to be quite small and you don’t get a lot of meat on them.
*Clonk*
Who died and made you Fairy?
Self-appointed apprentice, I’m afraid. Let’s hope it doesn’t end in tears; I mean, look at Anakin and Palpatine.
I’m not a Fairy, I just don’t like bad puns!
If that were true, we’d have lost you long ago.
I just get out all of my anger by *clonking* people!
And who says your anger needs to get out? I keep mine locked in the basement.
I get very touchy when I am mad about something that I can’t address. YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THAT?!
If you are a thinking, feeling, person; there will be lots of things that will upset you that you can’t do much about. If you continue to cultivate anger as a response, you will be angry a lot… Anger will become a habit that feeds itself.
*Clink*
She’s a real tiger in bed!
They did say love them, not stuff them.
So then she’s like a stuffed tiger in bed? I think I knew her!
I love my animals between to wheat buns with fries and a tall glass of Yuengling.
*two
But what if the animals don’t love me back?
Why love, when you can f*ck?
Why f*ck, when you can love, and make love? Secks is a waste of time compared with making love.
Mr. Married, I presume.
Married or not, it’s still true.
I actually reached this conclusion when I was single. After that I no longer had casual secks at all, but only with women I was in love with. The third one did end up becoming my wife.
There was a guy a while back that got in trouble when he was caught loving a predeceased deer in the ditch, maybe he would have had an excuse wherever this sign is.
Predeceased? So was it alive before he finished with it, or already dead by the time he got to it? Either way it’s kinda hot I guess.
Did knowing that change your desires??
JohnB. a little help, please!!
I think both JohnB and I were carrying on your joke… in my case at least, a bit dry.
I liked Johnbs’ spin on attempting to make ones’ desires conform to what’s legal.
I thought as much, even though it’s sometimes hard to tell where the joke ends. I didn’t think either of you would believe I was serious about that! Did you know John was re-working an old joke? I’m only assuming he knew it. Or maybe it’s GMTA again.
No, I didn’t know that. I’ve lead a sheltered life and only come out to play on the internet.
A joke alert would spoil it for me… I like suspension of disbelief!
Well, yes, of course I like to follow an old joke with a related old joke, although it is clear that our minds tend to run in similar directions fairly often. Sometimes I even feel bad about having the time zone advantage, since I’m sure I’ve stepped on many of your lines, including some I’m sure you would have done better. But that’s what you get for living in Scotland! 8^]>
I’m not losing any sleep over who gets to say what first, but I do miss being there when the good threads happen. I don’t think it’s the time zone difference (I’m about 15 hrs ahead of where this site is based, depending on the time of year) so much as the fact that I don’t manage to get to the keyboard until most merkins are asleep.
I don’t get the Scotland remark- I know you know I live in Australia.
Paws4thot recently commented that he thought you were in Scotland, which apparently I found more amusing than you did, since I remember it.
Ah. Yes, I do recall that comment, now that you mention it. It’s been *one of those days* for me, when my brain is not working properly.
I’m not sure I’ve ever had a day when my brain worked properly…
Is it as hot as ever?
I found myself freezing bottles of green tea and and adding water to them as I sipped it down last summer. It was the only way I could stay conscious.
Were you Down Here last summer?
It’s not hot right now where I live, but we had a record-breaking Spring heatwave last week. Now the forecast says rain and wind for a few days. We can’t count on consistency with the weather here.
Georgia Motors Trucking Association? What does that have to do with anything?
Yeah, but you’re really just flogging a very old joke.
Yes, but you never get any laughs for flogging a dead horse (and if there’s a place where you do, please don’t tell me), but flogging an old joke can still get you some.
I don’t think this is an Engrish, so much as a wording FAIL
I like how they tried to erase the ‘S’ that was actually correct.
How do you know that wasn’t caused by animals leaning against the sign while someone was loving them?
If it’s a grammar FAIL, its Engrish. So SHADDAP!
You are touchy today!
What if you want to tease the animals before loving them? Teasing is often a part of foreplay.
Searching for the erogenous zones on wild animals? Go ahead- I’ll wait here with the tranquilizer gun and the paramedics.
Love is a risky business! (Thanks for the support team!)
Always. To love is to leave oneself vulnerable to hurt, and if you try to avoid the vulnerability, what you have isn’t love.
♫ Wild thing you make my heart sing…
♪ Born to be wild…
♬ Lots of critter lovin’
Nowhere near the highway
Lookin’ for adventure
In whatever comes our way♬
Yeah, darlin’ gonna make it happen
Take a beast in a love embrace
So what if it is illegal
It fits with your taste
Like a true bestialist
You were born, born to do this
There’s so many kinds
Never will run dry
Booooooorn to be viiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiile *daaaaaa da da daaaa de de da da*
Booooooorn to be viiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiile *daaaaaa da da daaaa de de da da*
You guys are weird. Hey, leave that road-kill alone!!
Well, lexan D is packing a set of cutlery!
What sort of kinky depravity are we about to witness??
If he’s in West Virginia, he may just be searching the roads for a bit of lunch.
It IS getting to be close to lunch time and I do have to be on the road this afternoon.
*contemplating the culinary possibilities……NOT*
Teasing the hair add volume and poof and a sign of strength and vitality. Grooming is love and after being loved everyone radiates love to all around them.
And with wild primates, there’s the added protein during the grooming.
You’re spending too much time with the poodle, PG.
It works on the wife, too. A little hair teasing and grooming and she becomes a wild animal needing loving.
Why does that “too” in there make me uncomfortable??
I think I would feel even more uncomfortable if my husband came to me and teased and groomed my hair before getting intimate with me. He’s not that kind of guy.
Well, not to get too graphic, but my wife and I have used hair grooming, but not teasing, in a foreplay context. However, the hair on the head was not involved.
He should enjoy grooming you, a foot rub, shaving the legs and underarms, a back scrub in a bubble bath and pouring you a glass of wine …
Uh, foot rub, yes. back scrub in a bubble bath, yes. Pouring me a glass of wine, yes. But I am not letting him shave my legs and underarms
So he’s not to be trusted with sharp instruments?
Huh?
He is pretty good with sharp instruments. If he wanted to shave my legs, I am sure he would do a pretty good job.
What I am saying is having him shave me, would not get me in the mood to make love. Maybe some women find that arousing, like your wife liked the grooming of hair(not found in the head). But I am just not into the shaving and grooming as part of foreplay.
Different strokes for different folks.
Foreplay infers the path to carnality. I was thinking more of closeness, sharing, and intimacy, like enjoying each others body warmth on cold nights.
Sorry, but when you say, “…she becomes a wild animal needing loving,” my mind goes down that path to carnality! Not that I have anything against closeness, sharing, and intimacy in and of themselves…
I dunno. Works for me!
I’m beginning to understand why you’re known as ” PoodleGroomer.”
I read your reply to the poodle.
He says the dr is a lie.
If you ask most dogs, I suspect that they’d say that there’s no such thing as their human spending time with them. Otherwise, why do they follow you into the loo?
Human feces are the most malodorous of all. While humans are conducting business on the throne and hoping the fan keeps the wallpaper from peeling, the dog is wishing he could mark territory like that.
I think with our dog, it’s just co-dependency.
When I said graph, I meant picture. lol
this site kinda sucks. definately the weakest of the “icanhazcheezburger” partnerships
so go away, then.
By all means, move along! We already have no shortage of party poopers here!
In no way, shape or form is this Engrish.
I rest my case!
In no way, shape or form is this a productive comment!
I didn’t notice that my Copy Pasta is missing a comma that I would have put in…
In no way, shape, or form is this comment funny. All together now: Being a critic is easy. Being funny is not!
love ‘em and leave em (alone)
gmta
Again with the trucking…
Truckin’ got my chips cashed in
Keep truckin’ like the doodah man
Together, more or less in line
Just keep truckin’ on
Just fillin’ them spaces again. You know me…
♪ …Georgia on my mind….
i attacked a monkey once cause he stole my food with a baguette
Thanks for the warning. If I see a monkey coming towards me with a baguette while I’m eating, I’ll protect my food.
My advice is to give the monkey whatever he wants, and forget the food!
But then if you give the monkey whatever it wants, he will be spoiled.
If you forget the food, it will get spoiled.
Like it says in the Bible, “Share the food, spoil the monkey.”
Isn’t there something in the Bible about spanking the monkey to avoid spoiling it?
Well, I was being a little loose with the content of scripture, of course, but when you get to spanking the monkey, I’m quite sure the Bible does not have THAT page.
No, that page got “stained”, so they tore it out. It used to be in the Book of Solomon.
Now we know who the “Song of Solomon” was really directed at!
that has nothing to do with love
*pokes title* What state IS it legal in? *shudders*
A dissociative state. You might still be prosecuted, but your chances of a verdict of not guilty by reason of insanity would be rather good.
This advise is for women regarding the MEN, not the wildlife… And its sound.
Stop being teases! If you’re going to flaunt it, follow through. Otherwise close your legs and GTFO.
Some of us men do have more self-control than wild animals, and have no wish for women who are not sexually active or are in a relationship to dress like nuns. In fact, I much prefer women who have it to flaunt it! I am married, but not dead, and my eyes still take great delight in the female form, which I rank among the most beautiful sights on the face of this planet.
If my husband stopped looking, I’d wonder what was wrong with him. A man who says he doesn’t look at any other woman except his wife is either 1) fibbing or 2) dead. Nothing wrong with looking provided you keep your hands to yourself and your mouth shut.
I do also consider the obvious, open-mouthed gape to be in poor taste, both for the woman being ogled and for the wife or girlfriend present. I look, but not too obviously. I don’t exactly hide it, but I try not to be rude.
Spoken like a truly petulant little boy who can’t tell the difference between a low-cut top and an invitation.
Grow up, and learn to control your misogynist ego and your hormones. Otherwise close your mouth and GTFO.
I knew I could count on you to lay it on the line!
They probably have a really lenient policy on raising chickens too, http://lawblog.legalmatch.com/2009/11/12/don%e2%80%99t-cluck-with-my-heart-the-legality-of-keeping-chickens-as-pets/
That’s something new.
I don’t think this picture was taken in America. There are more countries in the world than the USA.
What if he’s hungry and I look like dinner?