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Cheezburger Company Blog
A Merry Crispness to all our readers.
and to all a good beer!
great because i don’t feel well XP
a m b u l a n c e
WAMBULANCE!!!
I’m only here for the ambiance.
Then it must be ok to be careless in limpness.
It’s your turn to clean the bathroom floor.
nothing quite like overdoing the tanning beds.
Perhaps a stool softener? (That is a toilet tank, isn’t it?)
Too many potato or corn chips will do that to you.
Have lots of tortilla chips with some good habanero sauce, and the next day you might have a meeting with Screaming Bernie.
Careful with that crispness, Eugene.
Don’t ax why!
You people are Animals.
Ummagumma take that as a compliment.
Just love these goofy mofos!
Early Floyd! I’d forgotten that one. I’ll have to get a copy from iTunes.
OMG! There’s a reggae version and a bluegrass version!
Which you were, here.
Maybe we could soften up your close-stool by exploding it.
I think that’s called diarrhea.
Yes, if it exploded you would indeed have a dire rear.
If you are behind (pun intended!) on payments to two parties, do we call that di-arrears?
If you’re behind in payments to the wrong kind of lender, make that die-arrears!
I think it’s a reminder to chew crispy things thoroughly. How thoughtful! Chips ‘n things usually soften in the G. I. tract, but they care enough about me to remind me!!
Be careful with those harsh browns.
And La Conejita was just kidding the other day, too!
Yes that’s right. You should never take me seriously.
How is your goat-child, by the way?
I had to give him up for adoption. I already have two human kids, I can’t take care of an animal.
Aww… I bet he misses his maaaaaaaaa!
*clonk*
*Clink*
*Clunk*
*Clank*
*Shank*
*Luffy*
….Uh……..what?
*Kaboom*
*Bakoom*
*SHAZAMM!*
*Shamwow*
You know we can’t do this all day. (Please!)
*Pudding Power!*
*Strawberries*
*Potatoes*
*Cheeseburgers*
*Meowth’s head*
(on a silver platter)
Get your own head!
Not really. I was only a surragate so the goat was never mine.
A surro-goat?
No, a scape goat. The goat escaped.
Lucy, you have some splaining to do! Why did you let the goat scape?
It went to Gotham City to become the Scaped Crusader.
Don’t you mean Goatham?
BOOOO!!!! *HISS!*
(?)
*Throws popcorn*
*Pops throwcorn*
Korn throws corn.
*Karen throws JohnB*
*JohnB is 6’3″, 220 lbs. Karen does not throw him very far*
You’re pretty tall! Not very heavy for being over 6′!
*Karen drives a bulldozer puts JohnB in it, Meowth and ShadowSplicer. Tells them to stop playing and takes them out to happy land where they never will fight again.*
Anywhere is Happy Land when you do acid! And it really did remove my lips/eyes!
Read Aldous Huxley “Doors of Perception,” and then say that.
It’s a good thing nobody was throwing c0ckp0rn. This could have been really messy!
I am tall, but I am far from skinny. If you watch a lot of (American) football, you can get a distorted picture of how much big people should weigh. According to the standard weight tables I am overweight, and I agree I could stand to lose a few pounds, but only 10-15. (And I personally think the standard weight tables are crazy.) But before I took up weightlifting I usually weighed 185-190. Since bulking up my upper body, I feel best at around 205-210.
Can you imagine what it would do to our bodies if we substituted the time we spend on Engrish for exercise?
We would all lose a few pounds for sure.
Not worth it.
Actually, I kinda need to gain some weight! *toothpick*
There’s goat ham now? Who’s been p0rking the goats?
I don’t know, but all the guys at Engrish are looking pretty suspicious.
I brought goat cheese to go with the goat ham.
Too bad we don’t have any goat eggs…
*Dreadful Pun Hell fairy faints*
*Clonk* Hey, you, WAKE UP!!
*Clonk* *Clonk* Hello? Anybody home?
You stunned her, just as she was wakin’ up! Dreadful Pun Hell fairies stun easily!
Give her some room, you are all crowding around her.
*Gets closer*
There’s a difference between human children and animals?
As someone who lives with both, most definitely! Animals are by far much lower maintenance and much better behaved.
I have had human kids and caprine kids, and really, the goat kids are easier.
Really? How come I didn’t know this before? So what you all are saying is that I should have given my kids up for adoption and kept the goat?
It’s your call…
At least human kids won’t eat the garden. Well, not much of it, anyway.
Decision: I have decided to keep my own kids. They are still at an age where they behave like wild animals, but I am told it gets easier with time. One of them is 4yrs old and the other is 2.5yrs old. It’s hard work, but I’ve become attached to them. I don’t think the goat will ever give me a kiss and call me mommy and hug me and tell me it loves me. So I decided to keep my children. Plus my husband would never forgive me if I gave them up.
Thanks for all your comments and opinions.
Who told you that parenting gets easier with time, and what planet were they from?
So then were those people messing with me? Were they giving me false hopes? I’ve actually encountered many who have kids and say that after they’re 6yrs old they get easier to deal with.
(They give me that look like saying “ooh, poor you”)
Oh, yeah. My 10-year-old is SO much easier to deal with than when she was 6. Back then, she’d throw a fit if she didn’t get what she wanted. Now, we don’t have to worry about what will happen. We know that if she doesn’t get what she wants, or if she does get what she wants, she’ll throw a fit either way.
You’ve become attached to them? Duct tape will do that, you know.
It was duck tape.
Is that what the stork left you?
It gives me a potential stroke. With these kids….well you never know.
Well, once you have them, you are usually stork with them.
You know, I really don’t like you very much anymore. *Clonk* *Clonk* *Clonk* *Clonk* *Clonk* *Clonk*
Why not? Everyone likes Meowth!
Crispness is a very dangerous town. It’s full of luggage gangsters. I’m going there for my holidays.
I shall certainly be careful! Nothing worse then a crispy muffin.
True. Compared to the swine flu pandemic, AIDS, terrorism, hunger, war, poverty, child abuse, and Celine Dion, I have to agree they all pale in comparison to the utter horror of crispy muffins.
*DELETE*