Free Hand Job
Submitted by: dunno source via Engrish Funny Submissions
Mistranslation of “handmade” in Serbian
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And how!
The bottle immediately to the right of the sign looks suspiciously like a trap . . .
I hope the one with the stopper contains the lube.
…he said, sheepishly.
So if it’s a mistranslation of “handmade” in Serbian… Does the free describe the cost of having the employees working for you?
It’s slovak, not serbian. But I don’t have any idea what they mean with “free”
It is Serbian. By “free hand” they meant “free” from any tech usage, quite unusual. BTW, they got confused in a weird way because ručni rad LITERALLY translates as “handwork”….
Man, I NEVER get invited to those kinds of parties…
If you want to fling really crazily, go to a second-hand shop.
All righty?
That is best left to the imagination.
I gotta hand it to you guys, these are good puns.
Yes. *Clonk*
We always try to be well-armed for the LOLZ.
all right! I love this place! its so handy when your down.
Whose down? Is there a duck here now?
Let’s give it a wrist already.
No. I’m putting my foot down now. I say puns are good!
Yeah, you say that until somebody gets jabbed with one!
If he’s putting his foot down, lets give him the five-finger discount on the hand job.
And make someone cry.
Isn’t that where the water comes from? ????
Well that’s exactly what we are talking about. If this is the free hand job, there must be lots of C0cks laying around on the floor. If you put your foot down you are surely going to step on one. Therefore water will come out like John said and the person who’s c0ck is being stepped on will cry, like I said.
I see.
I sea,
You sea,
Will all scream,
In the sea.
WOOPS!
I sea,
you sea,
we all pee,
in the sea.
Unless they like that sort of thing…
like the Reject shop
Well, i like to have one, pls^^
I get the rad part for the hand job; bur what does runci translate to?
“rad” = work / job / task
“rucni” = manual (as in manual labour). Related to “ruka” = hand.
Ali mozda nisam u pravo….
Where did the “free” come from?
Aha! they will work hard to give a free hand job! Helluva work ethic in Serbia…
Yes, they are very handy.
Using skilled hand-workers allows a custom selection of options and always produces a better outcome than a mass produced result.
There are always people that study intently at the trade fairs and go home and figure out how to do it themselves with good results.
Yes, that is true also, I have seen that.
Where are you hanging out…?
At the basement nudist colony?
Absolutely! I completely agree with that.
You are correct! But the phrase is “ali mozda nisam u pravu”. What you wrote means “but maybe i didn’t in the right one”. This was mostly likely translated like this on purpose, serbs often make english-serbian puns for their own enjoyment
I think all those glasses is where they collect the samples.
Or are they the ones they use to pass out samples?
Viagr@ samples maybe. For those who can’t meet the requirements for the free hand job.
(I just wrote this and got deleted.)
Yes, the V-brand-name is widely taboo on the net, since so much spam contains offers for those blue pills cheap. But apparently the moderators jumped right on that one. The curious thing here was that when I responded to your original post, the second one was not visible here.
Yes, things are getting a bit weird. When I posted the second time, the first one about V- wasn’t there. That’s why I had to repost. After this second time my internet starting acting weird and the site froze.
It’s weird that you say my second post wasn’t there when you responded because according to the times mine was before yours.
They deleted or lost my previous comments. I had no trade names, specific references, obscenities, or reason to be moderated I could see.
Did you use the worde G-R-A-P-E? That’s apparently considered obscenity on this site.
They are talking about hand jobs. What about G-R-O-P-E?
In a G-R-O-U-P?
That could be G-R-O-O-V-Y.
Well, if I’m going to grope something, I’d much prefer it be groovy.
Just dont make sure your child walks in the room at the time.
That would be G-R-O-S-S!
So the Grapes of Wrath are out of the question?
Wow, you’re right! I wonder why that is… It is awaiting moderation.
I guess it’s too much to expect moderation in moderation.
Could it be because of the word contained in this word. If you take away the G you end up with a word that they would probably not want in this site and they just want to make sure we are not using the G word to cover for R-A-P-E.
Which is why I have come to spell it “graype” here.
I thought so, too, but that is just silly.
Not that I am a child or anything!
My comments are never moderated! Maybe the mods don’t like you!
Every cat has his day.
My day is everlasting then! NEVER had modded comment!
Not to be a nit-picker about the matter, but while no doubt it seems to you like you have been here forever, what with the relatively slow pace at which time passes for you younguns, you remain, in the perspective of most of us senior regulars here on EngrishFunny, a bit on the n00b side. I heard people complaining about being moderated for months before it ever happened to me. And we’ve been upfront about what gets moderated, so you know some of the things to avoid, and all you’d need to do would be to make a joke about r@pe, or for that matter even r@peseed oil or graypes, and I can just about guarantee you’ll be modded. It’s been a while since I got modded, but it happens.
You are a little off there, John. Every cat has every day. All your days are belong to us.
That much is true – to a cat, every day is Caturday.
Yes, cats always believe that. Reality begs to differ.
Let’s let reality beg all it wants.
Reality can beg all it wants. I’m not giving it my days.
Ha! Thanks Meowth! You got what I was making a reference to!
All your days are belong to us! Every day is Caturday! And every single cheezburger is ours!
You are my rival, then. I will have your days yet!
You might not want his daze.
I didn’t mean it as a rivalry statement! I meant that to all non cats!
I will be top cat around here! Just you wait!
No waiting allowed! I already am the top cat!
I depose you! I’ve been here longer, so I stay the top cat!
How long have you been here?
Come on, guys, let’s not get catty here.
Do you really want to get your eyes clawed out? Then stand back!
Given that you are a “toothpick,” just try it and I will take you across my knee and spank you.
That’s child abuse!
Not, it’s not. That is a common misconception, but ordinary corporal punishment is not considered abusive nor a crime.
Wouldn’t that be animal cruelty?
You are not my parent, thus it would be child abuse.
It would be to prevent you from gouging my eyes out, as you just threatened to do. I think I’ve got pretty solid self-defense grounds here.
You do realize that many cats like being spanked, right? I think there is a Youtube Channel about it.
Perhaps they objected to your grammar here, since the Gr@pes of Wrath is the title of a book, and so is treated as a singular. Unless, of course, you were referring to individual gr@pes with bad tempers.
I was referring to the grapes in the book, actually. Although, if I remember correctly, there weren’t all that many of them, and they weren’t all that angry if there were…
Getting squished up in a book can make graypes VERY angry.
But then they always whine too much.
ZOMG! WE HAVE ALREADY GONE OVER THIS!!
I’ve been wondering this for a while… What does the “Z” stand for?
A theory. Could this site actually be a training camp for outsourced credit card and software companies? The mods work here for six weeks, and are then “promoted” to technical support for the ISPs ?
Why? Do they need to learn Engrish to work there?
It’s pretty sad if someone charges himself for one!
That will be $0, please! Thank-you! I mean, thank-me!
Looks like it’s me and you again tonight, Rosie.
I just have to buy an overpriced, tacky glass thing?
I’m sold, just so long as that creepy fat old man isn’t the one handing them out.
I have examined this picture closely, and cannot find any creepy fat old man in it. Have you considered eyeglasses? Or perhaps a nice antipsychotic medication?
JohnB, surely you understand the whole point of this website for some of us is Theater of the Mind?
I understand. I just don’t Mind.
Mind over matter. I don’t mind, so it doesn’t matter.
* watches as a young man, in not very good shape, creeps by way off in the back…*
There’s no actual indication of how expensive the overpriced tacky glass things are – it could be a very expensive hand job, in the end. You’re probably better off picking up some supplies at the craft shop, and doing a DIY job.
hahah… we have a lot of that here in Bosnia too
I would prefer you NOT tell us exactly what it is you have so much of in Bosnia, too…
LMAO! This is in Croatian – this just made my day! HAHAHAHA!
hahahahahahahahaha
This is croatian and means handmade or handcraft. LMAO
hahahahh this made me LOL so hard xD!!
HAHAHA epic! This is in slavic btw and spells the same way in Serbian, Croatian, Bosnian (basicly the same language) and probably Slovakian and Polish aswell…
This is in south slavic (Serbian, Croatian, Bosnian and Montenegrian – not on Macedonian and Slovenian).
West slavs do say “ruka” for hand, but work is not “rad” in WS languages, work in west slavs is “robota” (hence “robot”, from Karel Capek book, who was west slav).
West slavs live in slovakia, poland, czech, germany, litvania etc…
Hopefully this isn’t a trap set by Chris Hanson himself.