Comments on: Sweet! A Slip ‘n Slide must be close by.

By: asjk

asjk — Sat, 05 Dec 2009 05:08:34 +0000

It actually says water is a precious friend! that is the funny part

By: JohnB

JohnB — Tue, 24 Nov 2009 18:06:18 +0000

Okay. So what’s the distance between a whistle and a fart?

By: Meowth

Meowth — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 14:33:40 +0000

N2O about it!

By: Meowth

Meowth — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 14:31:20 +0000

No, the Fast and the Furriest!

By: bluejade

bluejade — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 05:59:23 +0000

If you want to teach your dog to whistle while farting, you have to go the distance!

By: bluejade

bluejade — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 05:57:29 +0000

Work on your timing and use better treats.

By: lexan D

lexan D — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 23:25:08 +0000

And that type of gas is no laughing matter.

By: JohnB

JohnB — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 22:32:42 +0000

Maybe it’s worthy of its own credential, a DF, a Doctor of Flatulence. I have heard, by the way, that the major source of air pollution in New Zealand is sheep flatulence.

By: dr handle

dr handle — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 22:11:21 +0000

I reckon you could get a PhD, a post-doc and a gaggle of honours students out of that topic.

By: JohnB

JohnB — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 16:25:14 +0000

I prefer my oxygen undressed, thank you.

By: la conejita

la conejita — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 16:16:10 +0000

Yes, but if he dresses up as Oxygen, then he will remain invisible.

By: JohnB

JohnB — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 16:13:48 +0000

So it seems to reason that if the Invisible Man wears any disguise, it must render him visible, since a disguise is, by definition, a change in appearance.

By: la conejita

la conejita — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 16:12:48 +0000

And if you slide down fast, that would make you:

The Fast and Furious.

By: la conejita

la conejita — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 16:11:38 +0000

I don’t know! If he’s the invisible man, I can’t see him.

By: PoodleGroomer

PoodleGroomer — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 15:08:36 +0000

That explains why my dog’s farts are not silent while he is sleeping on his side.
I thought the sound was generated by sphincter muscle tone and resonant frequency. (Wow, what a title for a graduate study thesis. It screams FUND ME! Ignoble Prize here I come.)

By: Meowth

Meowth — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 14:57:10 +0000

It would make me Furrious!

By: JohnB

JohnB — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 14:34:16 +0000

Would it make you furious?

By: JohnB

JohnB — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 14:33:31 +0000

Ah, if only it did, my life would be SO much easier…

By: bluejade

bluejade — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 00:28:33 +0000

Operant conditioning; works every time!

By: Meowth

Meowth — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 19:35:44 +0000

That would stick to my fur. I don’t like it.

By: JohnB

JohnB — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 17:35:30 +0000

If the Invisible Man were disguised as oxygen, in what way would he look different?

By: JohnB

JohnB — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 17:32:04 +0000

How ever did you manage to train her to do that??

By: blueJade

blueJade — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 22:47:00 +0000

Our dog makes a whistling sound, gives you about a four second warning. Then she wonders why you are swearing and gagging.

By: dr handle

dr handle — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 21:52:03 +0000

Veterinary trivia: dogs fart silently. It’s to do with the arrangement of their GI tracts; a quadruped’s GI tract hangs from the rib cage parallel with the ground (and to the force of gravity), whereas the direction of, ahem, motion for the human GI tract is from top-to-bottom. Dogs don’t get the same sort of pressurisation effects, because their guts work along rather than down. If a dog is farting with an audible “ththththtrrrrp” sound, it may be an indicator or some pathological change.

The smell that dogs are able to generate, though, is something else entirely. I suppose they have to pong so that you know they’ve done it. Otherwise, what’s the point? Actually, I wonder if those charcoal biscuits from the pet shop work on husbands too…

By: la conejita

la conejita — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 17:01:36 +0000

It’s a trick question right? You’re not wearing any pants!

By: bluejade

bluejade — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 10:25:40 +0000

And dogs.

By: dr handle

dr handle — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 07:01:00 +0000

*sigh* If only all men would learn to fart like this.

By: Droll not Troll

Droll not Troll — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 06:22:26 +0000

Kids sliding down the chute on slices of toast?
But please don’t call it iSlides. I think that one’s already taken, anyway.

By: Droll not Troll

Droll not Troll — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 06:14:34 +0000

And when above the sink, definitely no tap dancing!

By: Droll not Troll

Droll not Troll — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 06:11:18 +0000

Dark? Anyway, if it’s in new trousers, I hope it:
… cannot be seen, cannot be felt,
Cannot be heard, cannot be smelt.

By: la conejita

la conejita — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 22:37:07 +0000

Or fondling of any kind. Wait, unless the Invisible Man is disguised as oxygen and has been watching us while we undress and take a shower.

By: JohnB

JohnB — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 21:58:50 +0000

Vegemite Slip ‘n’ Slide! By jove, I think you’ve got an idea here that perhaps you ought to patent.

By: dr handle

dr handle — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 21:50:23 +0000

All praise to the Almighty Garden Filter, provider of clean water to sustain our plants! I’m certainly not going to waste it on slip’n'slide for some ungrateful little wretches… ackshully, in most parts of mainland Australia, you’d probably be shot for setting up a slip’n'slide at the moment, what with the drought and water restrictions. Unless you used it with Vegemite rather than water.

By: bluejade

bluejade — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 20:34:23 +0000

Still too early for the mice, then.

By: JohnB

JohnB — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 18:54:50 +0000

I kind of think oxygen is the most precious friend to man, since we can’t live but a few minutes without it, while we can go a few days without water. But hey, at least oxygen doesn’t require any c0ck-stepping.

By: lexan D

lexan D — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 18:04:14 +0000

yes you called me?

By: lexan D

lexan D — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 17:57:19 +0000

He did say the pants were new, there may not be any of those types of holes yet.

By: la conejita

la conejita — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 16:32:24 +0000

Water is the most precious friend to man, except for the one who’s c0ck is being stepped on to get it.

By: blueJade

blueJade — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 16:26:14 +0000

Wormhole to another universe?

By: lexan D

lexan D — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 16:02:23 +0000

Keys? Money? Credit Cards? Gum? Candy? Mice?

By: lexan D

lexan D — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 16:00:17 +0000

Yes, you should slide water carefully when above the sink.
Underneath the sink…well that’s another matter.

By: paws4thot

paws4thot — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 15:58:17 +0000

Wrong and wrong (and very pleased he’s wearing new trousers today).

By: Pjotr

Pjotr — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 15:29:31 +0000

Lint? (Optionally, evil lint?)

By: with_Apostrophe

with_Apostrophe — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 15:26:58 +0000

String?

By: paws4thot

paws4thot — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 14:30:08 +0000

What have I got in my pockets?

By: PoodleGroomer

PoodleGroomer — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 14:25:58 +0000

Ice skating rinks are more obligated to work with gravity than you.

By: Rhianimator

Rhianimator — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 14:12:43 +0000

of course you have to slide carefully. The water is my precious, I tell you, my preciooooooooouuuuuuusssss! *crawls back under a damp rock*

By: lawlin' at things noone else ever lawls at like the word moose; also the CEO of trolls on trial, we make you the FIRST one in court

Fri, 13 Nov 2009 13:38:40 +0000

bigger better faster stronger.

By: Rockingfreakapotamus

Rockingfreakapotamus — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 13:36:05 +0000

Carefully slide with Astroglide

By: Pjotr

Pjotr — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 12:53:58 +0000

But sliding carefully takes all the fun out of it!

Waterslides: Bigger, better, faster, more!