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Pork me, baby,
Pork me, baby,
All night long…
To the many here who are too young to remember, that is the sound of the old wolf Steppen’ out.
You know you FAIL so hard when you have to explain your own joke!
You know you fail hard when your jokes dont even make sence, tard, You know you FAIL (random caps) and you know who fail so hard…. what?
Hey, I wasn’t explaining the joke at all, merely giving the younger folks a clue as to the reference, which I think is considerate for anyone curious enough to try to track down a ref. As to my failing, I am fully aware that some of my jokes fall flat. I am not a professional comedian, and even the pros miss sometimes. But I’ve gotten a lot of feedback that many of my posts are funny. So when you have made as many people laugh as I have, then your criticism might mean something. As of now, your FAIL is a big FAIL. Being a critic is easy. Being funny is not. Try it yourself and see how you do.
Thank you, JohnB, I think I will try being funny on here! That is some good advice!
Born to be FAIL.
WIN!
I think the chorus is appropriate here:
Yeah, darling
Gonna make it happen
Take the world in a love embrace
Fire all of your pork at once and
Explode into space
Like a true failure’s child
He was born to be reviled
He can fail so hard
Never gonna win
Boooooooooooooooorn to be FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIL
(daaaaaaaaaaa da da daaaaaaaaaaaaa da de da da)
Boooooooooooooooorn to be FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIL
(daaaaaaaaaaa da da daaaaaaaaaaaaa da de da da)
John i was telling the guy who said fail, he failed.
I was right behind you on that one.
Yes, I got that, and many thanks for your support!
Funny thing was when I first read your first comment I had B.B. King’s “Rock Me, Baby” (or the Jimi Hendrix cover version, the one he did at Monterey, take your pick) playing in my head and not Steppenwolf.
Is Guinness there to witness and verify some kind of “Pork Mee” world record setting event? When will the video be available?
The Guinness in question is actually an Irish beer. A good one too!…well, that is, if you like the taste of black coffee…
It’s not a good idea to assume anything about other people’s tastes. I have always hated coffee, but I love Guinness. I really can’t see any similarity in flavour at all.
Because it’s bitter and creamy at the same time. And it’s addictive. And it’s the same colour. And it’s got alcohol in it, like all the best cups of coffee.
Ok I really want a Guinness now.
Guinness brewery founded and owned the World Records until recently.
The stout has more of a dark chocolate taste than coffee.
I get ticklish when I get porked.
Is there any crackling involved?
There would be if she were being porked with bacon.
copy and paste this thread over to FAILBLOG.ORG as a fail. This post can be included
No wait. We can get better, promise.
Quick someone write something witty and smart.
boobies
He said witty and smart…
I say, dear lad, would you be so kind as to utter some witty, intellectually stimulating words for us?
Just to clarify, I am not a “he”
Doncha love that? I thought it was the deep voice that got me mistaken for a guy; but nooo, it happens here too.
Until to be pretty I are from the change!
Why don’t we just retire to the ladies’ Happy Time room for a good giggle about it? And possibly a daiquiri.
You know I was thinking that when we became an avatar, we loose our gender identity. There is no sure way to tell. I thought that the fact that I have a pinkish color would be a clue, but guess not. My avatar name is Spanish for “female bunny” but I guess that wasn’t enough either.
I mean for all we know John B could be a woman. There is no way to verify that or the opposite, we just have to go with our instincts. I thought Dr Handle was also a man, until I read a reference about her husband.
[John, you better not get serious. Think about it. There's no way to know]
And well, pinkness doesn’t prove anything either. I’m male.
I suspect I actually am a woman, trapped in a man’s body. And brain. So don’t let my 6’3″ frame, my deep baritone, my beard, or my lust after women (in my heart, that is; I am faithful to my wife and always have been) fool you! And despite the fact that my icon is yellow, I am not a member of the Simpsons. Nor do you often see that kind of frown on my face. I usually keep a sly grin, as if I know a secret that no one else does. Because I do! That’s not serious, is it?
Lay off the Ball Blusher and teh pinkness will go away.
laconejita: Have you tried gravatar.com to get yourself a new avatar? I gave up, because I couldn’t seem to get through the process, but you might have better luck.
For the record, your tag makes your gender pretty clear to anyone who bothers to think about it. I’m nowhere near fluent in Spanish, but I took it to mean “small rabbit”, with a feminine prefix.
The icons we get here obviously give away nothing about us, but they sure can be fun to play around with when the context is right!
I don’t speak Spanish, so I had no clue about that one…
Thanks for the tip. I might just go there and get myself a new avatar. You might see me with a new look.
Hello to all,
First of all I would like to thank Droll not Troll for providing me with this tip.
I was able to go in there and get a make-over. This is the equivalent as surgery, except it’s not painful. I did have to change my name a little and add a 1 at the end, but it’s ok. I didn’t feel comfortable in my other body. I don’t wear glasses, so I didn’t identify with the previous avatar. Hopefully soon, I will start seeing new faces. Like John B said that he is not yellow and doesn’t have that frown in his face.
WHAT? I thought, I had Changed.
Soo dissapointed.
Ok, so when I posted the comment about being dissapointed I was seeing my old avatar. apperantly it takes a few minutes to make the change.
Thank you again Droll not Troll
De nada, laconejita! ( I think that’s right. I don’t actually speak Spanish). Another commenter told us about gravatar some time ago. Unfortunately, he hasn’t been around here for a while.
I like your new avatar.
Funny about the name problem. When I tried gravatar, I couldn’t seem to come up with a name that wasn’t already taken, and I tried some weird ones! I might try again some time.
I have reached an age where I can no longer avoid being curmudgeonly at times (d@mmit!!), so I can’t say my icon is completely inappropriate. And with my having been playing around lately with changing my name for various reasons, I’m kind of afraid to try now! I know it’s a learned association, but for me just seeing your icon starts me grinning, Droll.
You don’t need to change your name. It is based on your E-Mail Address. All of your previous posts also have the new you.
I like your Avatar, JohnB, but if you want to change it, I will like your new one. Droll, the name you use doesn’t matter, as Gravatar.com is associated with the E-Mail Address in Email (Obligated, safe. We never violate privacy), not with Name (required), as I have just demonstrated.
dudes mee is malay for noodles o.o
I’m fond of noodles myself, but I wont stoop to malaying to get them.
Pork mee with your noodle? Well, yes, that’s one pet name I’ve heard for it.
If I’m not mistaken, an old term for physical affection was “canoodling,” wasn’t it?
You are not mistaken and it is one of my favorite words
It just brings a smile to my face whenever I see it.
I’m a fluent English speaker and have lived in the USA for 10 years but this joke never occurred to me because I’m so used to reading “mee” as noodles…
And yeah I guess you could say it’s Malay for noodles but guess what, it’s a loan word from Chinese…HIDUP CINA!
I’ve been to Kuala Lumpur and live in Singpaore at the moment.
“Mee” is an indicator for some sort of noodle dish that’s common to Malaysia. For example, there’s another dish called “mee goreng”. There’s also “prawn mee” and “wanton mee”. I think “mee” just means noodles but I don’t speak Malay.
I know all about the wanton me(e), but not since I got sober.
You don’t speak Malay? How about Waylay, which I understand is the lingua franca of Shanghai.
You’re right bradleyf81, “mee” just means noodles, so this kinda doesn’t qualify for funny english, it’s just pork noodles =P and the Guinness sign’s just a sponsored ad for the whole food court…it’s a yummy dish too heh…
I dont think this counts as engrish…there’s no failure to translate…’mee’ is just the hokkien word for noodles.
maybe malay….or hokkien..anyhow it means noodles LOL
but to people who aren’t familiar……….
screw it I’m going to look at lol cats <.<
You mean “pork it, I’m going to look at lol cats”.
*sigh* Here we go again… Puerile 10 Year Old Within… if you don’t think it’s funny, go somewhere else… if it lols, it rolls… “poo bum wee, poo bum wee”… just let us laugh at it… etc. etc. etc.
its not a case of it being funny, its whether or not its engrish. Old people falling over is hilarious … but it has no place on this blog; neither do stand up comics, or flatulence; this is a blog for engrish.
… You’re new to ICHC, aren’t you?
And it’s quite obvious, of course, that we have far too many “pure” Engrish submissions for us to laugh hysterically over that we ought not bother with this impure drivel. *for those too thick to notice there is HEAVY sarcasm in my virtual voice here*
Correct…it has to be a hilarious mis-translation…maybe too literal…to be engrish. Pork mee = pork me teehee..if you’re 9 years old it’s funny in itself, I guess. >sigh< indeed.
Irish booze tends to have that sort of effect.
Guinness should always have a good head.
The hell with Guinness, I should always have good head!
id pork a guinness
Well, I’m sure your id would, but what would your superego think?
Cogito ego pork.
Superego, ergo guilt.
oh pork me my lovely
It’s been a long long time since a nice (or not so nice) young lady implored me to do this. It’s been a long long time since a nice (or not so nice) young man implored me to do this. Life sure is less eventful ever since I stopped drinking.
Look on the bright side, at least there are fewer pink elephants, yes?
The other bright side is that the vast majority of those “events” that used to occur while drinking are events that we are better off not having experienced. Drinking and drugging can certainly cause excitement, but they are often forms of excitement that can be very costly, in one way or another, or usually both!
Ramen to that.
isnt mee just a chinese word for noodles?
that want to be jolly well porked
Since 234 people (give or take a few) noted the same thing above, I believe there is a distinct possibility that you’re right.
pork mee is a singapore dish………….. but sounds reallly funny >_<
pork mee means pork noodles =)
I’d sure like to know how they make noodles out of pork.
I want to know how skinless, boneless chickens procreate.
I’m sure you can find a website with breathtaking illustrations if you look hard enough!
pork noodles = pork+ noodles
Any chance you could learn some English colloquialisms; “pork me” is one of the many ways of saying “have sex with me” in English.
Are there no conjunctions in Asian languages? If not, how do you know whether “rice noodles” is noodles mixed with rice, or noodles made from rice?
I’m no expert, but I don’t think Chinese even uses tenses. Conjunctions- who knows? I’m not surprised they have so much trouble with English. One book I read, written by a Chinese-born man who studied English, made me aware that some ideas just don’t survive the translation from one language to the other.
I wonder if the Chinese can tell the difference between noodles mixed with rice, and noodles made from rice, from the context?
Yeah, Pork Mee = Pork Noodles
It is translated from the chinese dish (Zhu Rou Mian), where Zhu Rou = Pork, and Mian = Noodles (Noodles are of the Rice or Egg variety usually)
Notice some similiarities between Mee and Mian.
Furthermore, Mian is Mandarin Chinese for noodles.
In countries like Malaysia and Singapore, where Chinese dialects (Hokkien & Cantonese) are common, “Mian” is used less. The hokkien pronunciation for “Mian” is “Mee”, and the Cantonese translation for “Mian” is “Mien” (That’s where the US gets it’s LO MIEN from).
Even the noodle guy needs some sponsorship to get his business going! – Hence Guinness. Some stores have Heineken or Carlsberg…
Local language nerd ends communique
Right on man.I’m from Malaysia myself.
Meeso Hammy! You Pork Mee rong time, ok G.I.?
When we want noodles mixed with rice, we say “I want noodles mixed with rice”.
When we want rice noodles, we say “I want rice noodles”.
Case closed.
Except, what is it you want when you say you want pork noodles?
mee means noodles.
i’m pretty sure mee is a kind of asian noodle. so this fails at being a fail.
As much as this sign is a fail, I’ve eaten the Pork Mee, which is pork noodles, from this exact stand! YAY for Malaysia..
Unless “pork” is Malaysian for “pork”, this sign was meant to be English… in which case it should have said “Pork Noodles”. To me this means it IS Engrish and qualifies as being funny.
I can’t help but think such signs as this are OFTEN made by people that know how it could be taken and do it for a joke.