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Slow Hand: Yardbirds was mixed like cream, and blind faith was broken by shotting the sheriff. Alcohol and drug….was drowned, woman left, child died, and SLOW HAND was born from the suffering.
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first. I wonder why hand is slow?
Broken Wrist?
Too much selfing himself.
That clazy Elic Crapton…
Slow Hand was slow playing 4 aces against a 4 card flush on the table. All in would scare off the other guy’s bet. Slow hand just looked worried and worked the chips until the other guy went all in.
The whiskey glass was just for show. That was Earl Grey. Odds favor the player that can still calculate the odds and watch the table.
The first time I got sober, I was in a weekly poker game with friends that all drank and smoked pot. I continued to attend the game even though I stayed sober. For the first time I noticed how much the other guys’ skills declined as they got higher. They eventually stopped inviting me, since I usually took most or all of the money.
Win.
He certainly did, in more ways than one.
The credit for the big W belongs to someone much greater than myself.
Me?
I think there are judgement issues there, too. Induced courage will keep you from folding a pair of fours or an inside straight when several people are betting big money.
Oh, definitely. The artificial courage led to stupid bluffing that was easy to spot. My buds also had a poorer memory for what cards had been played previously, and they all seemed more prone to “tells,” recognizable signs when they had drawn good or bad cards. Their ability to realistically calculate odds was not enhanced, either.
The other player had the queen and jack for the flush. Everyone else was playing side bets against Slow Hand. Slow Hand dropped the other two aces which killed the mother and child. He cashed out quickly and left with most of the town’s money for bigger games.
The sheriff wasn’t completely honest and worked for the house. He was supposed to arrest Slow Hand for cheating. The sheriff bet Slow’s hand. The sheriff decided it was time for a management change. The losses were so bad the house went bust. Slow Hand and the sheriff drank a few shots together before he left town.
If you aren’t quoting, you have the core of a good story there. If you are, then maybe it’s time to consider a little plagarism. Just for fun. And money.
Thanks. It is pure junk yard brain mining. I rotate a few words and try to find a find a stream of unconsciousness fit. My muse started using a whip on me at “Why hand is slow?” This was TV poker tournament finales when everyone is played out, a bad western’s crooked casino with a sheriff that wants reform, The Sting, Cincinnati Kid… I write one box full at a time and try to fit a nonsensical phrase into semicoherent fictional nonsense until I involve the entire text. I didn’t get to add a box with “The eliminated yardbirds were gathered at the final table thicker than cream.”
If those yardbirds are to be eliminated, put them in the dead bird disposal bin, please.
I need some rubber gloves.
You mean lubber groves?
Clever but I can not say it is funny–some things were too tragic to put on a t-shirt. Actually…SLOW HAND was the name give to Clapton when he would take so-o-o long to change out a guitar string during a performance. I can’t remember who actual started the name but he was famous and it was before the T-shirt happenings!
Oh wow. I’d like a shirt like that, with proper grammar/spelling, of course.
“Blind Faith was broken by Shotting the Sheriff.” You can do anything you like with the grammar and spelling, but it still won’t make a lick of sense.
I would too…Clapton is amazing (not god however, there are many better than him, such as Duane Allman, Bo Diddley, Pete Townshend, and many more)…but as a blues musician myself I have to say that this would be the type of thing I would wear (if it was all fixed up though)
I can’t let the moment pass without a nod to my personal favorite, Jimi Hendrix. But the really amazing thing about Clapton is how many different styles and types of music he has played so well. Of course, he is also fortunate to have had such a long career and to have survived a lifestyle that felled so many others, including Hendrix.
Jimi was dang flippin amazing. I in fact have an electric Dobro guitar from the mid 60′s that is nearly exact to Hendrix own. The thing is beautiful and has only a few finish flaws, but it sounds incredible. Funny thing is I picked it up at a garage sale for only $300. I think that the guy knew what he had, I mean this thing is worth over $1500 and this guy was a total guitar junkie theres no way he couldn’t, but he was actually amazed that me (a teenage white chick) had any clue about the blues and he sold it real dang cheap.
It gives me hope for the future that many young people love Jimi’s music. I’m old enough that the youth of today often seem to me to be from another planet. But if we can meet on Jimi’s planet (he definitely was not from Earth!), then we can work it out.
In Soviet Russia, hand slows you!
It does in my bathroom too.
This made me laugh harder than anything on the lol-sites has in ages.
not first
Not Engrish! That’s a direct quote from Clapton while stoned. 8)
And what makes you think Clapton didn’t speak Engrish when stoned? When I was lit up I was fluent in all sorts of languages, some of which bore a vague resemblance to an actual language.
Heh, lol.
and so is the pink elephant in the room
Do too many lines and you may end up with a lien.
Last!
I shotted the sheriff…but….
i did mot shotted the deputy
*not
I think you should keep the mot. It lends an air of mystery. Maybe you shotted the deputy and maybe mot.
Mott the Hoople?
Not quite.
I did not shooted the deputy.
I sweared it was in self defense.
I was gonna sooo post that but I see you beat me. Nice one!
Sorry I beated you to it.
not any more
Not any less.
Mmmm, yardbirds mixed like cream! Sounds yummy!
Crapton has quite the stoly!
Coke and heroin, too, but I’m sure he did plenty of Stoly along the way. I did if I could afford it, but usually had to settle for rotgut vodka.
Not all of us can live such storied lives. Mine would make even less sense.
i never knew Eric had been through so much pain
that story sounds like it would be sad… If I could understand it!
The shirt is attempting to make a summary of Clapton’s life.. the groups he was in.. a song.. his drugs and alcohol, losing his wife and his 2 year old son dieing when he fell from (i think it was 9th floor) balcony. I don’t remember about the losing his wife part myself and I don’t recall the words of his songs, but one had to do with losing his son, perhaps it was Slow Hand.
umm Slow Hand is the album.. of bummed out blues songs.. for which the shirt says “..and SLOW HAND was born from the suffering.”