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Len’d your ear to the whispars of lovers. Lovers are so beautiful with all of its subtle changes.
Submitted by: dunno source via Engrish Funny Submissions
Japanese washcloth from the dollar store.
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Cheezburger Company Blog
Oneliest
Hey guys, check out Phil Collins’ video from “Darkside Of The Moon”
I was thinking oneliest
Oneliest.
Who was Len, and how does one get Len’d?
In Russia, Len lens you!
…
That really didn’t work, did it?
That’s because Russia hasn’t had Len in for decades.
It’s also been quite a few weeks since the Orthodox Len’t.
What is the current interest rate?
Ask Jesus; apparently, he saves.
He certainly does. Ask him for a little spare change some time. His loans can be quite generous, and he never asks for repayment, although unfortunately so many people do so in his name these days that the very word “Christian” can make me shudder. And I’m a minister!
Amen, brother, preach on…I’m tired of the grubbers giving the non-grubbing Christians a bad name. It’s not about money, it’s about souls.
*whistles* yeah! you go!!!1!!!! I agree 100.5148784545424%!
Spiritual WIN!
What? But I are atheist! Here, you can have my spirituals, along with my spare internets (I don’t like to see them go to waste if I’m not going to use them).
It’s rude to boast about being atheist! After all, someone else might be more athy than you.
If I was claiming to be the most athy person, surely that would be “I am athyest”? Oh yes, do you want my spirituals? Really, I don’t like to see things go to waste.
No, silly, obviously the superlative of “athy” would be “athiest.” And yes, I’d be glad to take your spirituals. I never can get enough of those things.
wow! that means you don’t even believe in yourself! *shakes head* thats sad
Um, I’m not actually a god – I’m just a fairy from Dreadful Pun Hell.
Dr Handle, you are not merely a fairy from Dreadful Pun Hell. You are THE fairy from Dreadful Pun Hell!
Jesus saves, he passes to Noah…Noah gathered the puck, took a stride along the wall, and lifted his head to spot a last-moment scare: all 228 pounds of 6-foot-5-inch Abraham, one of God’s burliest Prophets, approaching apocalypse-like speed directly at him.
OMFG, where’s David when you need him?
…
Well, don’t just leave us in suspenders, what happened?
On the ice, I’d be inclined to sub Goliath instead of David. David is kinda small, and that rock-sling thing he does always gets him in the penalty box. Now Goliath is a bit slow, but when you’re over nine feet tall you don’t have to go far! You’re already occupying most of the ice.
He’s not agile on his skates, but he is very intimidating when checking and charging the goal.
Lovers are not necessarily so beautiful with subtle changes… At least that’s what I said to my girlfriend when her testicles dropped and her voice went all husky.
You love dudes.
Well Im not the worlds most physical guy
But when she squeezed me tight she nearly broke my spine
Oh my lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola
Well Im not dumb but I cant understand
Why she walked like a woman and talked like a man
Oh my lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola
Before-your-time-classic-reference WIN!
Yeah, once they start, they seem to want more and more.
Listening to the whispering of lovers is how you end up buying baby stuff like this.
And the changes are not subtle.
Changing a baby is definitely not a subtle business, especially on those occasions when you get a Level 5 Enfecalation Event.
My mom told me about one of my more spectacular enfecalations whilst a baby…
Father didn’t know what else to do except hold me under the bath tub faucet to get it off.
When my husband and a friend were left to look after small child while its mother and I went to do some “me-time” stuff, they simply let it run around the yard naked whilst they sat and talked (abount man-things, presumably) and drank coffee and ate biscuits and watched it run around, and hosed it off at 30-minute intervals. This was in summer, but I couldn’t help wondering whether their approach to child care would’ve been any different if it had been winter…
I was in the middle of changing my daughter when I got a call from a prospective employer about a job. Once I got the diaper off, just then the phone rang, and just then she decided she hadn’t gotten it all out. So in one hand I’m holding the phone, talking in what I hope is a professional manner to a new employer, whilst in the other hand is a naked baby spewing poop. It was one of the more absurd moments of my life, which has no shortage of absurdities.
Well, if you got that job…multi-tasking WIN!!
I did, but eventually found out I was working for a psychopath, and the head of the agency was both a narcissist and a psychopath. I got out of there after nine months.
Nine months? Did you feel like you were born again?
Ironic, isn’t it? But when I took another job and started work at a nice, small, friendly community mental health/mental retardation center in perhaps the most beautiful country in West Virginia, I did feel born again. I was living in a house 1500 feet up the side of a 3000-ft mountain, in a huge house with 30 acres and five outbuildings. I traveled to different centers all the time, but the drives had such breathtaking scenery that it was literally a pleasure to go. And then the clowns in Charleston (the state capital) messed with the funding and my job was eliminated. But all’s well that ends well, I suppose. I’m now doing work I love, making far better money than I made there, and while the country here is not so breathtaking, it is still very easy on the eyes. I hope to settle here, finally (at age 56!).
…and that’s where babies come from.
After 23 years, there’s nothin’ subtle ’bout them changes! Although I have found that Mrs. B gets a little p!ssed off when I refer to her as “it.” That is the upside, I guess, learning about those subtle nuances of communication over time. *sound of frying pan hitting head as Mrs. B stealthily sneaks up from behind*
Len is a cat succubus. She knows all about the whispers of lovers.