Eat nutritious food and you will be carp star
Original Photo: Marinerds
Submitted by: dunno source via Engrish Funny Submissions
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Is that something I’d want to be??
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crap star maybe?
Whole grains, and plenty of fruits and vegetables do get the bowels working
that’d be a carb star
“Uh, yes hello. My name is Randy Marsh and I believe I took the world’s biggest crap.”
Aw, tell it to Poo Story!
It was pee…wasn’t it?
I’m a fish star!?
Hey, there was Charlie the Tuna. He did commercials for years…
Don’t forget Nemo.
I can try.
Oh yes – he was crap, too.
Forget Chali 2na not.
Most people trying to be a star are mud sucking bottom feeders. A goldfish is a carp with his own costume. That’s Show Biz.
I could have carp as fans? Well, koi, maybe.
Using carp as fans would be kind of smelly, and you’d need a big motor to turn them, especially if the carp were big.
What would be your fan base and who would you attract as sponsors?
If you’re using, say, 5-lb carp as fans, I’d suggest a base of concrete, perhaps 100 lbs, with an 8-hp motor. I suspect you would attract many sponsors of the feline variety.
I’d like to be the goldfish on Alisee’s butt.
If i could be a parrot fish star, maybe id take them up on the offer.
Wait, I thought I already was a carp star? Is this saying I’m not?!?!!?
.
Dang.
In all seriousness…Japan has a pro baseball team that’s called the Carp.
Not even joking.
Scottsdale, Arizona has a team called the “Fighting Artichokes.” I’m not making that up.
Poca, West Virginia’s high school team is the Poca Dots. I’m not making that up, either.
Ottawa has a baseball team called Artichoke Eaters. I’m totaly lieing, either.
Everything I say is false.
Which means you lied that time. And you were lying before, unless you weren’t this time. AAAArrrgh! I hate this paradox!
Are you going to send me to Dreadful Paradox Hell? I have trouble getting an appointment to see one physician, let alone a pair o’ docs! Well, now I’m bound for Dreadful Pun Hell for sure. My personal favorite in this vein is, “Ignore these instructions.”
No, you won’t be going to Dreadful Paradox Hell. It’s a wonderful place, where only those who don’t deserve to be there are ever allowed to enter.
Oh CRAP! Now I can’t go there either!
I’ve visited there on a workplace exchange program – Archdemon Joseph Heller presides. It’s really cool. They have a jacuzzi.
And, of course, the M.C. Escher circular waterfall that always goes downhill in one direction.
They installed a revolving door there too, but it’s quite rusty now – nobody who goes there ever wants to come out.
I did see a couple of Eider this morning on my way to work; I suppose that would be a pair o’ ducks!
Until Conan O’ Brien pointed it out on his show, the Butte High School football team was named the Pirates. You do the math. ^_^
I don’t wanna be a carp star. They’re from Hiroshima, so they might have 3 eyes or some extra parts.
You’d be surprised what you can do with extra parts…
Just ask Jake the Peg.
Carp star, I see you in the morning
Carp star, a sleeping next to me
Carp star, let the memory of the evening
Be the first thing that you think of
When you open up your smile and see me, carp star
Well, you know those stars, always carping about their success, their connections, their fancy cars…
Ooh, my gills are all aflutter.
See your veterinarian. A beta blocker might help with that.
Don’t be too enthusiastic; today’s carp star is on tomorrow’s menu as fish dog meat silk (if you’re not actually exploding).
That is the world according to carp.
Did anyone else notice that the title on the menu board says ‘PRESENCE’?
Yes, and over the “Grill Burger” it says, “PRESENCE PRESENCE PRESENCE.” I guess they just want to make everyone aware that there is food present. Maybe they do an hourly food roll call.
Hey now, you’re a carp star
Get your gills on
Go swim…
I think that Carp Star was a level on Kirby 64…
No, it was an item. You jump on it and it takes you to the nearest pond.
well i dont know about you but my lifelong dream is to become a fish!
The thing about carp stars though, it takes forEVER for them to die!
Of course, this could be applied to Amy Winehouse as well…