Fried suki
Clean food good testes
Fried baby mussels
Submitted by: Mandy via Engrish Funny Submissions
Vientiane, Laos
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At least they’re clean
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testicles
Muscles
No! Testicles was related to Damocles and Heracles (but not Hercules).
Ah Et a fried Baby… mussel.
I had a fried baby mussel – but I eated it.
I don’t care HOW clean they are, I’m not eating anybody’s testes!
But would you put your whole tongue on them?
Only if they were not on the salad bar and only if that was all I had to do with them. I follow the rules.
And unfortunately, the rules follow me.
Who said you had to eat them? All it says is that they’re good.
Balls, good God, y’all
What are they good for?
Absolutely f*cking, do it, do it. do it….
Kicking them can be fun, too.
I’ll take your word for it!!!
Is she going nuts, or just a bit testy?
Big puns come in small packages.
Just tired; I’ve been out and about all day, and I’m absolutely knackered.
Did you get knackered in your knickers?
or because you’ve got big knockers?
I was wearing knickers whilst knackered, but no, my knockers are not whoppers.
I still agree with the late, great Frank Zappa: Anything more than a mouthful is wasted!
That was Zappa? I always wondered who said that first. Not sure I quite agree. I don’t knock knockers, although I’ve always been a leg man. Well, since I was about 8, anyway. Leg boy?
When someone told me that (or I might have read it), I was told it was a French adage. A frog boob philosophy, if you will. Though if Zappa were the originator it wouldn’t be at all surprising to me. Along with that I was told a variation: “anything more than would fit in a champagne glass is unnecessary.”
Told that to a lady friend of mine, and she looked very confused. She was thinking of a champagne flute, which would make things look a bit bizarre. I think I said something like “think something more like brandy snifter, then” and she got it, then.
I agree with it too, not that I would refuse the advances of a woman with bodacious ta-tas. Do not like the “bubble boobs”, however. No Artificial Ingredients, Dammit!
EPIC RHYMING WIN!
oh and, considering were punning here, hmm lets see…. oh okay
knockers on my whopper, make my knickers get knackered.
Your knickers get knackered whilst getting some nookie?
I eat animal testes occasionally. But as it’s a package of mussels, it probably has no testes in it apart from any that the mussels might have.
Check the fine print for “Warning: this product may contain nuts”.
Somebody wrote that on my lab gown. I can’t think what they were trying to say.
LOL! Exactly WHERE on the gown? The meaning would change with the location.
On the front. I don’t get no respect from the minions…
Anywhere around waist level, and I’m pretty sure It’s not a comment about your sanity!
You dirty little devil. Now, if they’d tried to write that on my knickers I might’ve had something really to worry about…
I used to date a girl named Suki.
She didn’t taste very good.
Suki yucky?
So was Terri.
No, she’s too talkative. Terri yacky!
Suki, lol, fried love suki=love/like
I had a cat named Suki. Would’ve been very upset if someone fried and ate her.
It would be funny if someone fried and ate Suki from The Threepenny Opera.
If those mussels were adults, that would even be accurate!
Sorry, mollusks do not have testes.
Actually…Testes is a general term for male gonads, and mollusks DO reproduce sexually. Mollusk gonads are generally close to the heart. It is well inside the body (closer to the shell than anywhere else), but in any case, yes. Mollusks DO have testes.
Yes, I see that the word is applied to analogous glands in invertebrates, so I stand corrected. My memory of what I was taught in zoology 35 years ago may be faulty; perhaps back then they didn’t use the word as broadly. Those are the twin hazards of living to be a dinosaur; you may not remember what you were taught, and then if you do remember it, it may now be wrong!
That’s ok. I was taught that Pluto was a planet, and they were in the middle of changing the ames of the layers of the atmosphere (books differed from teacher explanation), and the kingdoms of life were also changing (teacher taught 2 domains with 6 total kingdoms, book had 5 AND 6 kingdom version) and I’m PRETTY sure that has changed even more by now.
Most people still have in mind the Bohr model of the atom, in which solid little electrons take nice little circular orbits around the solid nucleus, like miniature solar systems, which was already seriously outdated when I was taught it in the 1960s.
Sounds like something from the Science of Discworld™ books where they mention “lies-to-children” which are the simplified & not quite accurate versions of the truth that kids are taught “until they’re old enough for the truth”. No wonder so many people are confused!
Well it’s not easy to draw pictures of electron clouds in the textbooks. Nobody would know what they were looking at!
I always clean my food, and it seems to have paid off.
In good testes? How does one know if they are “good”?
Interesting question. I can’t claim that they donate to Charity, because I never met the lady…..
We won’t talk about what happens if they’re bad!
Clean seafood makes testes sit up, ask for the testicle wash shampoo and go out and play.
Burning to f!ck the crayfish again, I see.
No mandibles or tentacles on the testicles. It’s time for afternoon fireworks.
Fried testes? Ewww…
I don’t think testicles taste good when fried.
So I gather you like ‘em raw?
Steamed.
Good luck on finding a consenting partner! Or is consent optional for you?
Poodle Groomer has indicated a willingness to boil his. Would that work for you?
No thanks, I’m not hungry.
Don’t people in Asia eat balls? So is this really Engrish?
In the sense of “food formed in spheres” yes, which very much does make this Engrish, because they’ve translated using the wrong sort of “balls”.
Might be “taste” instead of testes?
“clean food good taste”
Mibbae aye, mibbae nay. Either way we’re agreed that it is a mis-spelling or mis-translation.
You should say Ms.-spelled, most honourable, now poriticree collect
I am suspicious of any restaurant where they feel they must reassure you that their food is clean.
Almost rather have the testes.
People in Kentucky, not to mention other parts of the good ol’ you ess of A, eat balls. Here they’re usually called “lamb fries,” even though they’re more likely to be from bulls.
Of course, since the dish on the menu is apparently mussels, we can rule out the possibility that what is being served is actually testes.
Rule it in. When they cook mollusks of any sort, they generally don’t do a full dissection to remove the orgsans. That inclused the testes.
And I inclused a major typo there. Still, I am pretty sure if you dissected a cooked male mussel you would be able to find the testes still in there.
But if the dish shown was entirely or largely made up of testes from mussels, it would have taken a few million of them. I once dissected the salivary glands out of a fruit fly larva, but it took a microscope and a lot of luck!
Damn. It’d take me an electron microscope to even see those.
Actually, the larvae are bigger than the flies, and proportionately the salivary glands are roughly the size of lungs on humans, so they’re pretty easy to see under a light microscope once they’re out. You can’t see them at all when they’re still inside, though, which is where the luck comes in, since you have to hit just the right spot with the probe.
Here in the boring state of Nebraska where somehow we got the CWS… We call that the Post castration party on the farm… The only problem is i live in the city, and i find that disscusting…
Reminds me of a documentary I once saw where goatherders were castrating their goats by biting them off! However, they didn’t swallow, they spat. Apparently that was a waste of food!
I think those goatherders are on to something. It’s okay to bite, just don’t swallow.
Just don’t tell your man you got the idea from me!
or rocky mountain oysters
Also called “prairie oysters” (no bull)!
Order now and we’ll throw in a free teabag!
Not any more. The chef got the sac.
Yeah, he was fired because he showed up for work in the bag.
I live near a place called Olean MO, were they have a festival called the Testicle Festival. I have never participated BUT the Testicles go fast I am told. They also call them Rocky Mountain oysters.
I’m sure I’d decline to participate myself!
Certainly those are two things I’d be looking for on a dinner date.
I’d think good food and clean testes would be a more proper ordering of the priorities, but I have no experience in dating men.
If they’re not clean, they can’t be considered good.
True. Cleanliness is next to gobbliness.
*clonkiness*
Again, I would think clean food would also be required for IT to be good, but again I will defer to your expertise in these matters, since I avoid eating dirty food if at all possible.
There are theories that allergies and autoimmune diseases are caused by an OCD immune system with nothing to do cleaning the clean and attacking it. Perhaps we all do need some dirt in our lives.
That is why I encourage other people’s kids to wrestle with dogs, pick their own noses and hurl livestock dung at each other. It’s good for them.
There is actually some sound research showing that kids kept in fastidiously clean environments are more prone to illness than those who grow up like most kids, eating dirt, boogers, the occasional bit of feces, etc.
Why go out when the best is fresh made at home.
I doubt you’d have much trouble recruiting subjects for the study.
The hardest part might be finding enough people for the control group. Using all Amish, for example, wouldn’t be very scientific!
I’ve seen this sign IRL. That probably shouldn’t make me as excited as it does, haha.
If the OP reads this- It’s in the scummy food court of the scummy shopping mall, right?
That is correct, although the “i” (pronounced like a long “e” in English) ending is for the genitive case, showing possession. The noun itself is suka. But to call someone an SOB you would indeed say “suki,” and in fact SOB in Russian sounds, to an English speaker, very much like “suki sin.” (The noun for son, сын, has a vowel in the middle that does not occur in English. It’s kind of like a long “e” but is deeper in the throat, kind of like a short “i” in English.) But I wouldn’t recommend calling a Russian that, though. Their tolerance for foul language is lower than in the USA.
Ahh, okey-dokey. The part of the documentary that mentioned this was discussing the “Thieve’s World” that dated back to Czarist times and how the rules of this particular world underpin Russian crime and criminals. The word obviously was used by folks who were less than polite…
Is “SOB” a phrase used in Russian, with the same meaning. I’m curious, but I sure as hell ain’t going to use it in a sentence when conversing with Ivan and Sergei.
Yes, the same phrase is used with the same meaning.
Is now a good time to point out that “mussel” is a very coarse slang term in French for *female* genitalia?
.. Which makes the idea of fried baby “mussels” particularly revolting. I’m off to the steak house!
Wow this site has a lot of comments!!!! I have to come back again this is where everyones at!
Welcome aboard! Oh, and don’t just come here to read other’s comments: your 2¢ can add to the fun.
No it can’t.
That’s not an argument! It’s just contradiction! Oh, wait…. we already did that thread.
it’s funny how i can read, speak, and understand that. rofl.
It’s what I saw first, too. It kinda jumps out at you if you know what it means. It’s one of the few Russian words I know, sadly, and wouldn’t have known it at all if it were in Cyrillic in the picture. The Engrish folks apparently don’t know a lot of Russian, either.
Attention restaurant customers. Testicles. That is all.