Comments on: I’d recommend standing clear if that’s gonna happen

By: Matthew

Matthew — Fri, 11 Dec 2009 20:46:07 +0000

retard!

By: Luke

Luke — Mon, 29 Jun 2009 05:13:02 +0000

DAMN TOILETS! i can never crap when they’re decorating like that

By: JohnB

JohnB — Tue, 16 Jun 2009 19:25:05 +0000

Some decorators, like the purveyors of fashions that no sane human being would ever actually wear, do not strive to make any sense. But really, what do you expect when you let a toilet do your decorating???

By: blearg

blearg — Tue, 16 Jun 2009 19:11:23 +0000

wait… i dont understand!!!! HOW DO I UNDERSTAND THIS!!!

By: JohnB

JohnB — Tue, 16 Jun 2009 16:48:19 +0000

That’s an old wives tale! Now the hair on the palms is a different matter, but I’ve found that responds well to a depilatory cream.

By: Vila Restal

Vila Restal — Tue, 16 Jun 2009 09:35:43 +0000

OI!! You bloody leave your muse alone. You’ll go blind

By: Matt

Matt — Sat, 13 Jun 2009 04:34:36 +0000

Its Disabled Man Toilet at it again.

By: JohnB

JohnB — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 15:49:09 +0000

If left to our own devices, many of us men would do all our bathroom decorating by means of uncivilized urination.

By: JohnB

JohnB — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 15:47:27 +0000

Just ask Jimmy Carter.

By: JohnB

JohnB — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 15:47:08 +0000

Nothing worse than a bunny gone bad!

By: dr handle

dr handle — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 08:02:54 +0000

Many years ago, I had a wonderful but slightly daft German Shepherd, who spent nearly 12 months in puppy class (she was a late bloomer), and I used to threaten regularly to trade her in on a poodle…
Evil bunnies? You have evil bunnies coming into your front yard?? AAAAAAAAARGH!!! I hope you provide the poodle with plenty of ammunition.

By: PoodleGroomer

PoodleGroomer — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 04:19:16 +0000

I have been walking him off leash for years with only hand and voice commands. His job in life is to tell us when the mail man comes through, someone comes home, and protect the front yard from evil bunnies. They are a dangerous dog to own; most people can’t handle a dog that is smarter than they are. He is a people with a hair condition. He is my topiary. I keep trimming until I find the poodleness.

By: dr handle

dr handle — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 03:26:17 +0000

They are intelligent critters, poodles – do you do obedience or agility with your dog?

By: dr handle

dr handle — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 03:24:50 +0000

Perhaps this loo is not quite ready to host a civilised urinating just yet.

By: PoodleGroomer

PoodleGroomer — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 01:32:31 +0000

I’m doing the lamb cut, not the show style lion cut. The first short cut of the spring from the long winter cut takes 6 to 8 hours. One of you has to be a full time daily groomer for a show quality cut. A champion poodle has a 5 to 6 digit price tag.

By: skrag2112

skrag2112 — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 21:38:47 +0000

“This toilet decorates?” I think the correct term for this is “Navaho Spackle Job”.

By: JohnB

JohnB — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 21:35:44 +0000

$100 a month for a standard poodle? Phew!! How much would it cost for an exceptional one?

By: PoodleGroomer

PoodleGroomer — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 21:24:05 +0000

Pick one:

A. I own a standard poodle and decided that since grooming was costing $100 a month, I could learn to do that.

B. I started shaving my wifes legs and stopped when I got to her neck.

C. Both, but with separate equipment.

By: JohnB

JohnB — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 20:53:39 +0000

If I asked if that’s how you got into poodle grooming, would that be too snarky?

By: JohnB

JohnB — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 19:49:41 +0000

Thank you very much for explaining the nuance! I think most of us could figure out generally what the sign was intended to convey here (which is not always the case on EngrishFunny!), but we don’t usually get authoritative information on the precise meaning.

By: PoodleGroomer

PoodleGroomer — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 18:13:27 +0000

Somebody left the WSJ beside it and with the “toilet decorates” it was afraid its job would be outsourced. Have you ever looked at the job prospects for used toilets. It is probably enrolling in junior college or taking military entrance exams.

By: JohnB

JohnB — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 17:59:39 +0000

I know I should be understanding in letting my toilet find its muse, since I have been known to find my muse whilst sitting on the toilet.

By: Anonymously Secret

Anonymously Secret — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 15:17:50 +0000

Thank you for decorating the toilets! It is not inconvenient at all!

By: TheCannyScot

TheCannyScot — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 14:14:38 +0000

That could explain several color schemes I’ve seen places.

By: Jennifer

Jennifer — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 13:37:24 +0000

Ha
Dumb and Dumberer?

By: JohnB

JohnB — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 13:27:21 +0000

Yesterday eat sh!t, why should today be any different?

By: JohnB

JohnB — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 13:25:48 +0000

I know everybody is multitasking these days, but I thought surely my toilet would stick to the one thing it does best!

By: PoodleGroomer

PoodleGroomer — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 12:40:02 +0000

When the toilet finds its muse, does it channel Jackson Pollock? Does it do floor or ceiling murals? Uber fountains are soooo Las Vegas tacky.

By: what

what — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 11:26:14 +0000

It’s unreasonable to ask that I understand that, even if it does say please.

By: I'm the chief

I'm the chief — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 11:13:44 +0000

IT’S SH!T !! THERE’S SH!T EVERYWHERE! HE SH!T UP THE WHOLE PLACE! O M GOD!

By: steve

steve — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 11:06:35 +0000

first!