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I’d recommend standing clear if that’s gonna happen



engrish funny toilet decorates

Attention
the toilet decorates, causes inconvenenceto you understand please!
Thanks!

Submitted by: mike via Engrish Funny Submissions

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» Glory! 31 Comment

  1. steve says:

    first!

  2. I'm the chief says:

    IT’S SH!T !! THERE’S SH!T EVERYWHERE! HE SH!T UP THE WHOLE PLACE! O M GOD!

  3. what says:

    It’s unreasonable to ask that I understand that, even if it does say please.

  4. PoodleGroomer says:

    When the toilet finds its muse, does it channel Jackson Pollock? Does it do floor or ceiling murals? Uber fountains are soooo Las Vegas tacky.

    • JohnB says:

      I know I should be understanding in letting my toilet find its muse, since I have been known to find my muse whilst sitting on the toilet.

  5. JohnB says:

    I know everybody is multitasking these days, but I thought surely my toilet would stick to the one thing it does best!

    • PoodleGroomer says:

      Somebody left the WSJ beside it and with the “toilet decorates” it was afraid its job would be outsourced. Have you ever looked at the job prospects for used toilets. It is probably enrolling in junior college or taking military entrance exams.

      • JohnB says:

        If I asked if that’s how you got into poodle grooming, would that be too snarky?

        • PoodleGroomer says:

          Pick one:

          A. I own a standard poodle and decided that since grooming was costing $100 a month, I could learn to do that.

          B. I started shaving my wifes legs and stopped when I got to her neck.

          C. Both, but with separate equipment.

          • JohnB says:

            $100 a month for a standard poodle? Phew!! How much would it cost for an exceptional one?

            • PoodleGroomer says:

              I’m doing the lamb cut, not the show style lion cut. The first short cut of the spring from the long winter cut takes 6 to 8 hours. One of you has to be a full time daily groomer for a show quality cut. A champion poodle has a 5 to 6 digit price tag.

              • dr handle says:

                They are intelligent critters, poodles – do you do obedience or agility with your dog?

                • PoodleGroomer says:

                  I have been walking him off leash for years with only hand and voice commands. His job in life is to tell us when the mail man comes through, someone comes home, and protect the front yard from evil bunnies. They are a dangerous dog to own; most people can’t handle a dog that is smarter than they are. He is a people with a hair condition. He is my topiary. I keep trimming until I find the poodleness.

                  • dr handle says:

                    Many years ago, I had a wonderful but slightly daft German Shepherd, who spent nearly 12 months in puppy class (she was a late bloomer), and I used to threaten regularly to trade her in on a poodle…
                    Evil bunnies? You have evil bunnies coming into your front yard?? AAAAAAAAARGH!!! I hope you provide the poodle with plenty of ammunition.

  6. TheCannyScot says:

    That could explain several color schemes I’ve seen places.

  7. Thank you for decorating the toilets! It is not inconvenient at all!

  8. JohnB says:

    Thank you very much for explaining the nuance! I think most of us could figure out generally what the sign was intended to convey here (which is not always the case on EngrishFunny!), but we don’t usually get authoritative information on the precise meaning.

  9. skrag2112 says:

    “This toilet decorates?” I think the correct term for this is “Navaho Spackle Job”.

  10. dr handle says:

    Perhaps this loo is not quite ready to host a civilised urinating just yet.

    • JohnB says:

      If left to our own devices, many of us men would do all our bathroom decorating by means of uncivilized urination.

  11. Matt says:

    Its Disabled Man Toilet at it again.

  12. blearg says:

    wait… i dont understand!!!! HOW DO I UNDERSTAND THIS!!!

    • JohnB says:

      Some decorators, like the purveyors of fashions that no sane human being would ever actually wear, do not strive to make any sense. But really, what do you expect when you let a toilet do your decorating???

  13. Luke says:

    DAMN TOILETS! i can never crap when they’re decorating like that


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