Sleeping 102
Advanced Blanket
Engrish photo by Iva T
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Not sure if it’s really Engrish or just someone trying to be impressive (unsuccessfully), but woven into the item permanently. Brilliant.
It’s my submission. Someone really did that and my dad was weird enough to buy it AND proudly display it on the living room table. LOL.
Oh, on that note: it’s obviously a table cloth, so I’m not sure if those people knew what a blanket is, even.
It’s a tablecloth that has the wrong name woven in? I’d buy that, too.
Yes. I assume it should be an “advanced tablecloth”; but whatever is its skill, we have not figured it out yet.
Tired of those NORMAL blankets that just keep PEOPLE warm? Try new ADVANCED blanket! Now your furniture can feel as snugly and warm as you do in the winter time! (Warning: Use of Advanced Blanket on humans can cause social awkwardness, cancer, loss of vision, and bad table manners)
This magic carpet comes with auto pilot.
Why didn’t I think of that? I’d be rich by now.
This would nicely balance my retarded pillow!
There’s a really dreadful pun about WHY it’s retarded, but I’m not going to post it. Too cruel.
Hehe. Computerized weaving can get unexpected results.
And the next level up is Master Blanket, for Masterba…uh…
Oh, come off it!
Oh, get off and come on it!
Ok, now come back on it
Make sure you buy extra nob nob pads.
It’s for the advanced sleepers.
Unquiet Slumbers for the Sleepers……In That Quiet Earth
The advanced blanket.
What is advanced about it?
Don’t think I could tell.
Well obviously you aren’t advanced enough for the advanced blanket
What’s advanced?
Well, it surpassed all the blankets and it qualifies as a nice-looking table cloth…if only there wasn’t for its wonderful name weaved on it on each of the corners.
Advanced haiku asks
“Why advanced?” in right number
Of syllables. Win!
Until this time, I was unaware of the complexities of blanket technology.
Can we get blankie Cliff Notes, I wonder? To learn how to sleep faster?
so THIS is what they are making in Area 51…..
And the Snuggie is the remedial blanket.
win.
It’s also cult robes. You can only watch propaganda.
For those who have moved beyond the simple blanket.
Which side is up? Are you supposed to read it while facing the bed or while being in bed?
Ditto Thrawn’s rebuttle, above.
The prerequisite for this is Basic Blanket – for Beginners.
When you pull THIS blanket over yourself, that music from 2001: A Space Odyssey plays in the background.
It’s such an advanced blanket.
You need a real big brain to use it on your bed.
i’ll take a beginner variety, please.